SALOON

NERD.RODEO

Saddle Up • Log On

A private frontier for fraggin', raiding, and hollerin' at your party across the digital desert.

The Homestead

What we're runnin' out here

Saloon doors

Voice Saloon

Low-latency voice comms for coordinating raids, callouts, or just shootin' the breeze while the tumbleweeds roll. No eavesdroppers, no strangers—just the posse.

Ridin' In Soon
Gaming controllers

Game Corral

Dedicated servers for whatever we're wranglin' this month. From survival sandboxes to tactical shooters—your ping stays low and the server stays up past bedtime.

Ridin' In Soon
Watchtower

The Watchtower

Uptime monitoring, server status, and dashboards. Know when the herd is online and when the range is quiet. Because even cowboys check Grafana.

Ridin' In Soon

WANTED

Alive or Lagging

Doomguy Scout Gordon Freeman Ripley Zorg Alan Turing Grace Hopper Sgt. Johnson

REWARDGood Times & Low Ping

Rules of the Range

The code of the digital frontier

  1. I Don't be a varmint. Trash talk is an art form. Toxicity is just lazy. Know the difference.
  2. II What happens on the ranch, stays on the ranch. Our servers, our business. Keep it in the family.
  3. III Touch grass occasionally. We respect the grind but the sun exists. We've seen it through the window.
  4. IV No crypto cowboys. This ain't a mining operation. The only rigs out here run framerates.
  5. V This here's a grown folks' frontier. The language is salty, the hours are late, and the humor ain't rated E. These open plains may not be for everyone.
  6. VI Respect the bandwidth. Torrenting anime during raid night is a hangin' offense.